Dear Anonymous:

“I’m just mad at ME for not clarifying intentions earlier on”-  make a strong mental note of that and correct in the next relationship, or potential relationship, clarify intentions early.

I understand that when he chose to sit with you after yoga, in your relaxed state there, you felt “completely content and happy to just be friends and I don’t actually feel mad in the moment at all”-

– because he approached you, paid attention to you; he didn’t ignore you, he was not in there with a girlfriend and he did not approach another woman for a relative private chat.

Like you wrote three days ago, you have a core belief that you are not good enough, and the fact that he rejected your suggestion that the two of you become more than hookup friends triggered that core belief. Plus, three days ago, you still expressed hope that there will be a relationship between you and him beyond the past hookup situation: “with sex off the table.. I’m wondering if he’d change his mind”.

Problem is that he is now a sore spot in your psyche- the representative of your I’m-not-good-enough core belief. This means you are likely to get upset if you see him with another woman, thinking something like: why not me, why is she good enough and I am not;  you are likely to get upset if you see him around and he ignores you, if he pays attention to another woman while you are around, etc.

What to do???

Work on that core belief more,  more than you already did. Do you want to share more about it here?

anita