Dear noname:

I am so excited to read that you met a woman who is interested in you, and who seems emotionally healthy and that you are “committed to building emotional intimacy with her slowly before getting physical”!

I suggest that you commit to a certain length of time of not getting physical, let’s say two weeks, a non-negotiable two weeks. At the end of these two weeks evaluate and decide. If within these two weeks you met her many times and had wonderful conversations, if it seems very promising, then.. maybe decide that it is okay to kiss the week after, after that week, evaluate further.  This is better than not having a timeline at all, or  having a timeline that is difficult to keep and that doesn’t permit evaluation, for example: a month of no physical contact, and that month happens to include many good dates.

Regarding your sister, you can meet her outside the apartment where she lives with her mother. But like I wrote earlier, I really don’t want to appear like I am pressuring you, not at all. I am okay with dropping the issue, you already know my position and most importantly by far- you know that it is the position of the boy in you.

And you are welcome. And it is true, I do have your best interest in mind.

anita