Hi Clarissa,

Thanks for the detail of your own experience. I am definitely glad to hear you were able to move on….eventually. I’m also glad to hear that you have started seeing someone else who is lovely and I hope it does indeed work out.

It’s been 9 months since my final breakup, so maybe it will take some more time. I’m not actively delaying the moving on process, I’m doing my personal best to not have the feelings I have, but it’s going slower than I anticipated. For whatever reason. We all exist in this world with our own unique conditioning, values, thoughts, feelings etc.

I’ve gotten some great advice on this thread from others who had not dissimilar situations to me and they have moved on, which is wonderful. Maybe one day I’ll be one of those people. Right now, I’m not. I’m about to start a new part time job, I’m going to therapy regularly, I’m exploring further travel, I go out regularly with friends, I’m not being a hermit wallowing away in a corner. But it’s just taking its damn sweet time for my heart to catch up and tell me to move on.

I regularly check in with every thought of my ex by countering it with a negative memory to try and offset the rose-tinted glasses. I’m trying to imagine having a different life to the one I know have and I try to picture that and get specific about what that would look at. And yet……here I am.

Anyway, thanks for your input and sending good thoughts and wishes to you for the future! x