Hi Genie,

Thanks for that. I would say that yes….it’s completely done for my ex and while it hurts….again…..I think I’m probably better off knowing in the long run, because like I said, nature abhors a vacuum and I was making up every sort of scenario in my head when there was no contact, whereas the cordial communication this past week or two has normalised the situation….and yes hurt me for hoping when there clearly is no hope, but maybe I needed to hurt in this way. I didn’t seem to be doing a great job of moving on by myself despite my various attempts.

I appreciate you saying you think I’m in a better place. I wish I felt it. In some ways I think I’m as far back as a month after the breakup with no new insight in quite some time and literally no idea what direction to head in my life now. Ironically, the makeup job would challenge me far more as it’s completely out of my comfort zone and I’m starting from scratch so would have to persevere and develop and grow to get to where I want to be, which is be my own boss, I guess. The other job – would look better on paper I guess and would feed my ego if I got it because it would look to be a step up from where I previously worked, but it’s an area I’m confident in and where I feel that bit safer. Maybe I’ll feel better about it all if I sleep (or try to sleep) on it.

I’m glad you got a positive response from Jay about meeting up when he’s back. There really is nothing to beat a good old fashioned conversation and heart to heart at times to make things clearer and reduce anxiety. Let us know how it goes and remember, you’re an incredible person to who has a lot of value. You’re not damaged, you have been through some tough experiences, so you’re just someone who has been through some tough experiences, but come out the other side. So keep the faith and I hope all will be well.