Dear Matthew:

I am glad you invited me to ask you “absolutely anything”, and that you let me know that you will answer my questions honestly. I will take full advantage of this invitation, all for the purpose of greater understanding and moving forward in your emotional learning journey.

A little summary of some of what you shared (and I am focusing only on your childhood emotional experience, not on your parents’ good character and such): you were taught that it is admirable to be educated, to work hard, to treat others with honesty, to never fool others for a personal gain, and to be frugal, not wasteful (“used everything we had”).

You were thin and wore glasses every since kindergarten. Following kindergarten, in school, peers mocked, called names and bullied for being thin and wearing glasses. You told one or more of your teachers about it, but nothing changed as a result. You knew that your peers had the physical advantage over you, so you didn’t consider hitting back.

After a boy from school, a bully, poured a drink on you on your way back from school, “just for fun”, you were scared of going out alone on the street for a few years. Some of that fear is still there, walking on the street alone. You can see that the police, just like your teachers, do not protect people from bullies. And therefore, you “have absolutely no power over the situation”.

Question: your parents taught you never fool others for your own advantage (“they never fooled others for their own advantage”). When you told them about the bullies in school and on the street who fooled you for their own advantage (their advantage was having fun, ex:  the bully who poured a drink on you “just for fun”)-

-what did they say/do to correct your situation in school/on the streets?

anita