Sammy,

Do you see already how strong you are? Not long ago you were on the floor in the pits of despair, ready to take your own life over the loss. Currently you are reaching out to strangers asking how you can help them? If that’s not an absolute major shift of willpower and growth and resilience, I don’t know what is! You’re doing really well, considering what you’ve been through.

Yes you’re right, I started the thread in Oct 2018, but the process was hampered slightly I guess as I reunited with my ex for a third time in March 2019 and we split again in May 2019. Also while I still ruminate about that relationship, I can function now. my functioning ability was minimal in Oct 2018 and honestly, at the time I could not see any way out of it, but I’m glad I’m ib a better (albeit not completely out of it) position right now. I’ll consider what you said about the therapist, it has given me food for thought and might be an avenue worth considering.

I’M OUT OF SELF ISOLATION THOUGH! WOHOO!!! What this means is that I can now move freely around my home….who knew such small pleasures would mean so much! But I can do laundry again, I can cook again, I can do chores to make the day pass quicker….so this makes me happy currently. Still no results from the Covid 19 test, we have fallen somewhat behind due to a global shortage of certain elements needed in the labs to determine test results. In one way, I hope I did indeed have it, because if so, I got off pretty lightly in terms of symptoms and will also have better immunity towards it in future but most importantly, despite having it, I didn’t pass it on to my vulnerable father, which would be the biggest win of all. However, reality would tell me that it’s unlikely I had it as the virus is so contagious, it would seem miraculous to have had it and not passed it on to another person in my household.

CB, it’s an extraordinarily difficult time in your life right now and adjusting or adapting is going to take time, processing and little steps day by day. One day it won’t be as painful, keep looking forward to that day and remind yourself that one day, what you’re feeling now will have passed.

I know the PM is in ICU now with Covid, it’s strange times we’re living in across the world. But we have humans in this world that have created the most unbelievable and extraordinary things in this world, cures, technologies, so I have faith that humans, albeit caught off guard by this, will adapt and accept and figure out a way to survive. Survival is what we do, as a species.

Hang in there all . x