Dear Soul-searcher:

“why can’t I just be content with what I have”- because you keep wanting something you don’t have.

What you don’t have is the feeling that you are okay, that you are loved and lovable.

Regarding your new thread, I will respond to it here and hope that other members will respond to you there. I think that working with vulnerable children is a very valuable job: some of these children, maybe all, feel the same as you do: not being loved, unlovable, not okay.. hurt, angry, enthusiasm here and there followed  by the same  old same old discontent.

“but again, I want something that fulfils me and makes me happy! I have chosen so many careers.. How do I find out what I want!”- at the risk of repeating myself (I do repeat myself a lot), I don’t think it is possible for a person who feels unloved and  unlovable and not okay to be fulfilled and happy.

Once you realize deeply enough that your childhood experience of rejection and abandonment and mistreatment was not because you were unlovable, and that you were and are indeed lovable, then you will feel okay.

anita