You’re welcome. I’m just wondering, what kind of situation brings up this feeling for you, that your boyfriend doesn’t understand you ‘at your core’? Is it because he shows no interest in the things that make you tick? Your hobbies, the things you love (maybe art, music, running, animals, growing orchids) or is it more fundamental like politics, attitude to money or religion? Or how much time you want to spend with friends and family (ie away from him), or how you dress or where you want to live?

You say:

“it feels like we’re not emotionally connected all the time”

which is OK, two people can’t go about joined at the emotional hip all the time. But do you mean that, when you express your feelings either verbally or through actions, he sometimes turns off from you? That he seems to disapprove of you sometimes?

Or if, say, you want to carve a career growing orchids which would make you happy but not rich, and he thinks you should do a job you hate because you can make a lot more money that way, that’s a pretty big stumbling block as he is not showing concern for your feelings. Or if he wants to have five children and you’re not even sure you want one.

I know that nameless feeling, I’ve experienced it. Sometimes it’s that we do know, deep down, what the problem is but we don’t want to address it. If you feel there’s something missing, it might well be something you should spend some time examining (on your own) to make sure it’s not a huge red flag that you should not be ignoring. If, as you say, he’s amazing and cares for you deeply, he will be willing to work with you on any doubts you may be having.

all the best

Jan