Dear Ifty:

I think that you are too emotional at this time to make good choices. Too much emotion, too much need and desperation creates fog in the brain and interrupts logical thinking. Here is an example of such fog:

“I am afraid once I move on with my life, he will come again to mess it up. I do not want (it to) happen”-you don’t want to move on and have a good life and then he returns to it to mess it up. Your illogical solution is to not move on with your life so to not have a good life before he messes it up again.

A logical solution is to move on with your life, have a good life, and not let him back into your life.

Is there a way for you to calm down, relax, so that you can think logically- maybe take a long walk every day, take on yoga, listen to calming music, guided meditations..  make a daily routine for yourself including these things I just mentioned?

anita