Dear Nichole:

www. who/ int/ violence injury prevention/ adverse childhood experiences, a website by the World Health Organization, reads: “It has been shown that considerable and prolonged stress in childhood has life-long consequences for a person’s health and well-being. It can disrupt early brain development and compromise functioning of the nervous and immune systems. In addition because of behaviours adopted by some people who have faced ACEs, such stress can lead to serious problems such as alcoholism, depression, eating disorders, unsafe sex, HIV/AIDS, heart disease, cancer, and other chronic diseases.

“The ACE International Questionnaire (ACE-IQ) is intended to measure ACEs in all countries, and the association between them and risk behaviours in later life. ACE-IQ is designed for administration to people aged 18 years and older…”

I looked at the questionnaire. I will copy a few the questions. Each of the questions is referring to an ACE in childhood (emotional neglect, alcoholism, drug addiction, mental illness, parental separation/ divorce, verbal/ emotional abuse, physical/ emotional abuse, sexual/emotional abuse, and more):

2.1  Did your parents/ guardians understand your problems and worries?

3.2 Were your parents/ guardians too drunk or intoxicated by drugs to take care of you?

4.1 Did you live with a household member who was a problem drinker or alcoholic, or misused street or prescription drugs?

4.2 Did you live with a household member who was depressed, mentally ill or suicidal?

4.4 Were your parents ever separated or divorced?

4.6 Did you see or hear a parent or household member in your home being yelled at, screamed at, sworn at, insulted or humiliated?

4.7 Did you see or hear a parent or household member in your home being slapped, kicked, punched or beaten up?

5.1 Did a parent, guardian or other household member yell, scream or swear at you, insult or humiliate you?

5.2 Did a parent, guardian or other household member threaten to, or actually, abandon you or throw you out of the house?

5.3 Did a parent, guardian or other household member spank, slap, kick, punch or beat you up?

5.5 Did someone touch or fondle you in a sexual way when you did not want them to?

5.6 Did someone make you touch their body in a sexual way when you did not want them to?

There are more questions regarding being bullied by peers and suffering from street violence and war, etc.

In the www. cdc. gov/ violence prevention/ ace study. pdf website I found many more questions under the “Female Health History”, including:

17. With how many different partners have you ever had sexual intercourse? # of partners?

20c: Do you smoke cigarettes now?      24a: What is the most you have ever weighted?

25a: How old were you when you had your first drink of alcohol other than a few sips?

30a: Have you ever used street drugs?,  and many more questions.

My concluding thoughts and closing of my four study posts:

You suffered from multiple ACEs (emotional neglect, parental separation, parental drug abuse, sexual abuse, and more). I suffered from multiple ACEs as well, and our individual combinations of ACEs resulted in prolonged and acute stress that damaged our brains and bodies during childhood and onward.

At this point, it is most important for you (and I), to keep our stress level as low as possible, on an ongoing basis. I would say that this the first priority. Regular exercise, a yoga routine, a daily routine overall, mindfulness exercises and guided meditations- are all excellent ways of minimizing stress level, as well as attending quality psychotherapy if available.

Sometimes psychiatric medications are needed. I understand your reluctance, as it may be related to your two parents have been abusing drugs. But.. sometimes these are needed. But not in the way you used psych medications: taking this or that here and there, on an impulse, then stopping- not following the doctor’s instructions for long. Psychiatric medications are not supposed to be taken willy-nilly:  you have to take them as prescribed for a long period of time while being under a doctor’s care.

True, psychiatric medications have side effects and some, if not all, are addictive in one way or another- but think of all the side effects of (non-medicated) acute stress: dangerous behaviors, chronic illnesses and early death.

Psychiatric medications when prescribed by a responsible psychiatrist and when taken persistently according to instructions- can reduce your stress level significantly and in so doing, increase your chances of being safe and healthy. While taking these medications, you can work on establish your daily routine, attend psychotherapy if available, learn new skills to lower your stress level- and when you are skillful enough- then you can lower the psychiatric medications according to a responsible doctor’s instructions.

anita