Dear B,

This Indian guy you dated is an a$$hole in simple words. You do not deserve how he treated you. Your daughters do not deserve the example of such a man in their mom’s life.

I am an Indian who grew up in India. I know a lot of Indian men and women who cop out on their love relationship in the name of my parents blah and many who stay true to their relationship.

The guy you dated was lying to you in many ways, playing on and off, not having courage and strength of character. And, your story is more or kess similar to mine. I left mine couple years back and things started becoming better with time, my self esteem returned. Pleasw focus this time on healing yourself and your daughters. You have been through a lot, a divorce and then this.

I know its difficult, I have been there, best option is to go no contact and focus all your energy on understanding what led you to those two relationships – your marriage and this guy – and work on yourself.

Its not your mistake at all. There is nothing that you could have done about it. He knew he had Indian parents and a white girlfriend. Replace white with “taller than me,” older than me”, girl from another caste, girl from another religion, etc etc etc. This is all crap. He is an adult. And why do you want an adult whose parents decide who he will marry in your life….?

The guy was a bad deal anyway. I wish I could have said all this to myself when I had wasted two years of my life on my ex, I wasted many more. But, today, I can’t believe I loved that kind of a person at all. Today, I would never fall for anyone who mistreats me, is immature, parents boy, even if he was nice to me initially.

Sending you love.