Dear soma:

You are welcome, and thank you for wishing me a great day. Regarding your choice of a university, you mentioned three, they all very prestigious, rank highest in Turkey, all are very difficult to get into, and the majority of the classes in all of them are taught in English (Wikipedia):

1) Bogazici University is the first American higher education institution founded outside the U.S.- how interesting! It was founded in 1863, and to this day, the university maintains strong ties to the American educational system

Problem is, only  800 applicants out of about 1.8 million are admitted for the programs the university is well-known for: electrical and electronics engineering, computer engineering and industrial engineering. About 1% of applicants are admitted to other programs.

2) Koc University: It has an extensive network of over 250 partner-universities including University of California (which I attended, post bachelor degree, a few classes), and it includes a Graduate School of Business (GSB) program- which will fit your interest in majoring in business.

3)  ITU, standing for Istanbul Technical University, ranks 1st in Turkey in the fields of Engineering and Technology and in Natural Sciences. It includes 99 undergraduate and 192 graduate programs. Entrance to most of its departments requires the top 1% of nearly 2 million applicants taking the entrance examination. I see on their website the impressive white ITU Faculty of Business building.

You wrote earlier: “I feel like I’m anxious all around the clock… I struggle with the relationships I have with people”- it seems to me that the relationships you have with the people in your life are fueling your anxiety, keeping it going around the clock. To lower your anxiety, change what can be changed in regard to your relationships:

1) Because people are telling you that you should hate your father, if I understand correctly- don’t talk to your mother and others about your father, so to not get their reactions. No reason to stir and receive their disapproval and anger.

2) You wrote that people have expectation of you, and that you “try to  hide (your anxiety) from people”- talk to the people (you may  be referring to your mother…?) and ask them to go easy on you, tell them that you are more likely to fulfill high expectations when you are calm, and unlikely to do so when you are anxious, so it is to their best interest to not fuel your anxiety. Let them know in details what they need to do- and not do- to promote your calm.

Also, to promote your calm: set a daily routine of aerobic exercise, such as fast walking for half an hour a day, or an hour, and check out mindfulness guided meditation programs, such as the one by former Oxford University professor Mark Williams.

anita