Dear Katie:

You are welcome and thank you for being the gracious person that you are, welcoming my thoughts even when you disagree with them and thanking me for them- this is my evidence, that indeed, there is something “very wrong” (your therapist’s words) with this man for messing up a relationship with you!

When I posted you last, I thought of your first 4-5 years with this man having features of limerence, particularly placing him on a pedestal, and therefore, not noticing the serious faults you now know that he possesses, and presenting the relationship in such glowing, happily-ever-after terms, regarding  those first 4-5 years. I was afraid, that it will be too easy for you to fall back there (an appropriate way to put it, fall.. in love).

Good to read that the “forever hopeful” Katie (Nov 6, 2020), is  “not holding onto hope” (April 8, 2021).

Connecting the topic of hope, what your therapist/ psychologist told you (“keep your eyes wide open and feet on the ground),and the title of a famous poem (“Hope is the Thing with Feathers”)-

– Hope, displaced,  is like a bird that lifts you up, off the ground, flap its wings in your eyes, so you close them, and then, not seeing, without the ground underneath your feet.. well, you can picture the rest.

anita