Dear Aimee:

You are welcome. It is a significant piece of information, that you and your boyfriend are currently on lockdown, spending 24/7 with each other. It is an anxiety producing/ stressful situations for most people who spent so much time with each other but are unable to socialize with other people and enjoy activities where other people are present, such as going to the movies, sitting in a restaurant, etc.

There are online resources regarding managing the lockdown situation, including available guided meditations to help with lessening anxiety and stress level.

In regard to your experience with your parents, when you lived with them- your empathy was with your father, understandably, because he was mistreated by your mother who also mistreated you and your sister.

At about the one year mark experience that you mentioned in regard to your previous relationships, were you perhaps trying to protect the guys from..  you, fearing that you might mistreat them like your mother mistreated your father? Or were you afraid that the guy will start mistreating you, if you stayed?

anita