Dear Kibou:

It is clear to me that the challenge you have faced on this thread: communicating at length with two members about an emotional loaded topic- is just too much for you, and understandably so. It would be too much for me too, if I was in your place. The topic is just too sensitive, too emotional. Therefore, following my shorter post here (pointing to something that seems important), I will withdraw from your thread and make it possible for you to communicate with only one member at a time.

A week ago, on May 17, you wrote: “I get upset when people get angry at my mum and judge her to not be a good mum and blaming her (saying things like ‘she should not have done that’). I logically understand what they are saying, but I also get frustrated at what they are feeling towards my mum.. their feelings come across as anger or rage sometimes.  They do not know her whole story, nor mine..”-

– what this means is that people were told about what your mother said and/ or did (perhaps you told them), and their reactions were anger and rage at your mother for what she said/ did,  judging her as a bad mother. You expressed that logically you understand their reactions. But loving her as much as you do, you went to great lengths to defend her, describing her as a very good mother, and saying that people unfairly expect parents “to be perfect”, and to not “make mistakes”.

anita