Dear Roro:

You are welcome. I believe that you made the right decision ending the friendship with her. It is not possible to be just friends with someone for whom you have romantic feelings.

She told you back in April that she will ask you in early July whether you wanted to go on a holiday trip with her and friends. She later found someone else to take your place, and without asking you if you wanted to go on the trip, she  proceeded to book the trip without you. “She says that she just assumed that we weren’t friends anymore”-

– she should have asked you because she told you that she will ask you. On the face of it, her not asking you is not a terrible behavior if your friendship was questionable at the time, but it indicates, in my understanding, that she did not think of you as special enough to keep her word to you, and therefore, she is not The One for you (“She was the first person I’d ever been on a date with and I built up a lot of expectation in my head thinking she was ‘the one’”- original post).

“Everyone’s different with how they think and feel about these kind of things”- The One would have remembered and cared to keep her word to you.

“I will eventually forgive her in my heart but today, and probably the near future, is not the time”- that’s wise.

In my experience communicating with you here, you are a decent, respectful, caring and romantic young man. I think that the woman who ends up with you will be fortunate. This woman is not the-one, but she is the first you ever dated, you are only 20, and you only need one woman to be..  the one.

Feel free to post again anytime, on any topic, and I will be glad to reply to you.

anita