Dear Anita,

“I would be better off was a wise investor, nurturing and growing her investment instead of abusing and destroying her investment!”

There was nothing wise in her behavior. She was feeling better giving in on the short-term pleasure of abusing you. She may have had power over you but it didn’t bring her the luxury she wanted as she wasn’t wise enough to nurture her investment. And eventually, because you are a person and not a money-making-thing as she would have wished, you managed on your own to grew wiser than and and cut down her power. Allowing yourself to grow for your own sake.

“and.. thank you again. Yes, I am free from that guilt, and as I just remembered how I used to feel vs how I feel now in regard to guilt, I had the image of me floating in the air, above the chair I am sitting on.”

It seems like a very good feeling. You did it. What a long, painful, difficult journey she put you through and yet, you are there, now, free from her. And encouraging people on this forum to take small steps away from their own abusers with an understanding only someone who have been through such an experience can have.

“If you imagine yourself as an adult walking beside the child that you were, walking across a bridge, and she is scared: don’t push her forward. Instead, take her hand gently in your hand and patiently help her take small steps forward.”

Right, when it comes to emotions and facing unknown and fear, we still are children aren’t we? It is important to be encouraging but patient, keep trying but gently…

My brain is blank, I have no plan. But as long it is with trustworthy people, I can probably go with the flow and figure it out as I go.

Linarra