Hi Anita and TeaK,

I would like to apologize for replying this late. I got caught in a lot of work and in addition we are going through a very hard and complicated situation with my boyfriend. However I would like to thank the both of you for replying and helping me.

TeaK: he did  justify why he wanted to take a break, but he didn’t say clearly why, rather he said stuffs such as “no sorry I don’t think I feel comfortable enough with you anymore”, “no sorry I don’t think I am ready for anything serious right now” and it was only when I dug a bit that he said he was going through a tough period with his depression. In addition, he feels unworthy of being loved, unworthy of my love because I am successful and he is being afraid that I would realize that he wasn’t “worth it”.

Anita: Thank you for your concerns. Regarding his treatments, it is kind of weird at some point for me. It’s been almost 7 months that he has been taking pills and yet he keeps having roller coasters many times. It’s like he couldn’t stabilize himself. One month he is feeling ok and two weeks later, he withdraws again..

Anyways, after all this time, I finally found out that it’s also very anchored in him to withdraw when things start to get tough. He needs his alone time and tend to want to fix all by himself his issues. It’s not really healthy since he leaves me in the blue but well, I know he works on it.

Also, we are going through another hard period like I said at the beginning. He has started to literally overthink about his sexuality. It came all of sudden. We were extremely fine together, talking about moving in together and one month ago approximately, I saw him starting feeling down and getting in another depressive phase. This is at that time that he has started to question himself and I really don’t understand. He has never manifested any signs of attraction to men. We talked many times about this since before him I dated a lot of women. We have always been extremely open about this and he knew he didn’t have to feel scared when it came to this matter. I read that depression affects everything and it may also re-question our deep-self including our gender identity and our sexuality. Could it be true? He is very feminine, but how he chooses to express his gender has nothing to see with his sexuality and he considers himself as a man.. I am very confused and I try to figure out if it’s his depression which talks of him trying to express his true-self?