Dear Anna,

it’s good you decided to distance himself from him and take a break. And also, that you’ve realized he has a tendency to be unhappy, even though he would have all the reasons to be happy. But there is always something preventing him to be happy… and until he deals with his deeper issue(s), he won’t be capable of a healthy relationship.

It’s great to read that apart from problems with him, you have a great life, great successes and a promising future. But like anita noticed, you still didn’t perceive it like that, but felt that without him, your life was a wreck. In spite of your personal successes and the fact that you “totally enjoy yourself physically and mentally”, you still couldn’t imagine your life without him.

Like anita said, this could be related to your childhood and the inability to be truly happy if one of your parents isn’t happy. This same dynamic is now playing out not with your parent(s), but with your boyfriend. If you have a hard time letting him go, it could be a sign that there is a wound still active in you, where you seek love from an unavailable parent/partner. Does this seem plausible to you?