Dear sossi:

You are welcome.

“as we went to school, there were people there too”– I am not a religious person, but I do have my favorite part of the bible, it’s the first chapter, and it starts with: “In the beginning”- our Beginning is the most powerful part of our lives, and for most of us, that beginning is Our Mothers: the ways she held us, fed us, smiled at us.. or not.

“All I know is that I’ve always had this terrible low self esteem“- “always” has the sound of..  In the Beginning.

“On the other hand i have enormous inner strength that I don’t know how to describe“- life longing for itself, life longing for more life. Nature deserves the credit, the nature of life itself.

“I feel intensely betrayed. It happens with every person”– In the Beginning, you were betrayed. And ever since, you imagine being betrayed by everyone.

“there could be weeks of very sweet and loving behaviour, next.. he tried to pick me apart.. blew hot and cold.. Approve and disapprove, good and bad, the same push and pull behaviour that leaves you frustrated because you cant win“- you wrote some of this regarding your mother and father, some regarding your ex boyfriend. Is there a difference?

anita