Dear Emma,

I think the greatest problem is your insecurity and lack of faith in yourself. I can relate because I was similar. You say:

I have a lot of technical skills, but I worry I am not good enough. But more than that I worry I don’t have the right sort of personality I need to get a good job.

You also say you worked too hard and stayed in difficult work situations where you were overworked, underpaid, and your hard work wasn’t recognized:

I stayed in many stressful, difficult work situations where I was underpaid, and thought if I tried harder and harder and tried to stay positive I would be recognized.

In your other thread, you say:

I don’t know how to stand up for myself or remove myself [from the situation with your boyfriend].

It’s hard for me to stand up for myself when standing up for myself kindly doesn’t work, or people won’t admit to the things they’ve done.

I believe that your inability to stand up for yourself and demand a higher pay and better work conditions is related to your inability to stand up for yourself in your romantic relationship. If you agree, and would like to share some more about the conditions that led to your lack of self-confidence (perhaps in your childhood?), please do so…

• This reply was modified 3 years, 1 month ago by Tee.