Dear Ryan,

good to hear from you again, I am glad you replied.

I’m moving here in about a week and a half, so I’m been prepping. … our return to the office was pushed back from Jan to possibly March or April.

I see. So I guess you are still staying in the same area (in the Appalachian), since the cost of living there is much smaller than in the big city?

The girl I’ve been seeing for much of the year would like me to move and return to stay with her …. It is a source of stress for us both.

Right. Because she would like you to stay, and you would like to leave the relationship, at least you wanted it a couple of months ago. Has that changed in any way? Are you still determined to break up once you move to your new location?

By the way, what do you think about what I’ve said earlier as a possibility about your childhood:

You mother didn’t show emotions to you – that could mean she didn’t show joy while she was around you, taking care of you, spending time with you, playing with you. If the mother is cold and detached and doesn’t show warmth and tenderness, that can be devastating for a child. It registers as rejection – and it could lead to you concluding you aren’t good enough and there’s something wrong with you.

Do you think this is a possibility – that your mother being emotionally cold and detached led you to believe that you are unlovable and that there is something wrong with you?