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Dear miyoid:
I want to follow suit and like you, make a change: keep my post not so deep and not pessimistic, but optimistic and simple (“I should learn to keep it simple sometimes, without looking into it pessimistically… I’ll try to keep myself optimistic this time“). Maybe it will make you feel better to read it! I would very much like it if you felt better when reading my post, so let’s see how this goes.
“Even after those hard conditions, you’re posting here, which means a lot. How can you do that?” – habit and meaning, I find meaning in communicating here with people from all over the world. I’ve been communicating with you since June 7, 2019, and I am grateful for this opportunity to learn about you: you are interesting to get to know, and I only started to get to know you, there is a whole lot more to you!
“Maybe we’ve developed a connection” – yes!
“I’ve got my education till high school at a school where my father was a teacher…. I was holding the burden of ‘representing my father’ and something I did had the possibility to embarrass him… After I started high school at a different school… a different school full of slightly less successful student which made me sparkle there. I was more confident” – I didn’t know all this. Like I said, I am still getting to know you!
“I sometimes feel superior to my peers, and that actually creates some kind of a suffering. Since I feel superior intellectually or ethically, I can feel like I deserved better than somebody who is not as intellectual or as ethic regarding behaviors or even thoughts. And when that person has more than I do, then the suffering I mentioned plays a role. I actually don’t suffer if we have the same amount of happiness or success, but when that person has more, I feel worthless…. This makes me think that we should keep this thing in balance. I think that most of the people I seem to be bothered by feeding themselves and their ego more than they should be. Would you agree to that?” –
– Trying to keep it simple and optimistic, I’d say that feeling superior to others and feeling inferior to others are two sides of the same coin and both sides bring suffering. Feeling equal to others is the key to mental health. Feeling equal makes us feel worthy while feeling inferior or superior makes us feel worthless, sooner or later. I agree that we should balance our superior/ inferior ego with… equality. By equality, I do not mean that we should endorse ignorant thinking and harmful behavior. I mean that as human beings we are inherently equal, born equal, no better and no worse than any other human.
Did I manage to keep this post simple and optimistic?
anita