Dear anita

You touched a nerve. Yes, especially now when I feel very vulnerable and I am often around my father that emotional abandonment/ betrayal wound opens up quite often. It turns me to a very negative and difficult person. I really don’t like this side of me and I blame myself.

You asked a very good question of how I can get a real-life experience of being caught when falling. If I would know that I would probably not feeling lost, anxious and alone. I would be more active in my own life and not circling around my past or future. But maybe volunteering can be something or finding a support group for real human acceptance. I am also thinking a lot to get a little job to feel like I am doing something. At the end it is really just to reach out or to jump in the cold water.

Sesha