Dear Lindsey:

So better not break up with him. The solution to your distress is learning emotion regulation.

Positive psychology. com: “People who are struggling with emotional dysregulation react to relatively mild negative events in an emotionally exaggerated manner”. In my post yesterday, I wrote that you tend to overreact emotionally, it means that you suffer from emotional dysregulation, the inability to bring down distressing emotions (so they remain intense for too long).

There are unhealthy ways to regulate emotions: shooting heroin is one unhealthy way, another is ending a good relationship (which you are considering doing). There are healthy ways to regulate emotions such as self-care and the practice of Mindfulness. The website I mentioned has worksheet on emotion regulation. There are other online sources on the topic, and books and workbooks. From a quick search, here are a few books and workbooks: “Emotion regulation in psychotherapy”, ‘Master your emotions”, “the road to calm workbook”, “Your emotions and you, Workbook”, and more.

anita