Dear Anita,

So, do you think that this happens because I am afraid that my feelings will betray me again, so I kind of developed a defence mechanism when it comes to love and relationships? When I first started to be with my former boyfriend I was infatuated and I didn’t really think about his faults, and after a while they started to become really obvious, but with my new boyfriend it just clicked when we started to know each other, and I felt in my heart that he will be my husband. It felt like in a second everything felt in place, and I had my future very clearly planned ahead of me.

Regarding your last comment, you might be right, I think I may have chosen not to feel in love with him, because I lost trust in my feelings, so I started to panic and I just made things worse.

My question is how do I get over this confusion? Should I take a break from him and try to answer all these questions alone or should I just try to spend more time with him, without any pressure, and see if the feelings come back? Do you think that if I had such strong feelings for him once, I can have them again some day? How do I stop thinking so much about everything, relax, and just listen to my heart?

Thank you! 🙏