Dear iamone,

Thank you for sharing some more about your life. I completely understand why you chose security back then, being a single mother of two small children under the age of 5. And why you were reluctant to take a student loan and go study law, even if you enjoyed working at a law firm very much. I think you chose what was best for your children – to have a stable income and convenient working hours.

So you chose to be a teacher. You hated it, but it enabled you to raise your sons, right? You may have not followed your heart’s desire (to be a lawyer), but you followed a sense of responsibility and duty. You sacrificed yourself for your children. That’s admirable.

Now the situation is different. You say you wouldn’t even need to work if you don’t want to:

I have to add that I don’t absolutely have to work. I mean, how lucky is that? I realize I could just call this retirement.

So there is no pressure, or at least not such a big pressure, to make money any more, right? You don’t have to sacrifice yourself for anyone. You can do whatever you want – you are free to do it.  Whatever you choose, you may do it (or start doing it) as a hobby, without worrying how you will pay your bills.

I’d say you are in a much better situation now than years ago… because now, if you want to, you can follow your heart’s desire. I don’t mean you should become a lawyer – it does seem overwhelming to plunge into it at the age of 56 (although there are people who get their diploma in their 70s). But you can choose whatever you like, without the pressure of making money.

How do you feel about that? About the idea that you do what you enjoy (e.g. paint or write – you say you enjoy both quite a bit), but without pressuring yourself to make a career out of it? To be famous for your work? How would it feel to just let it flow, without any expectations?

You said about painting or writing:

Still, I don’t think I should feel like I need these things to justify my value as a human being.

You most certainly don’t. You are valuable as a human being simply because you exist. You don’t need to do anything to prove your worth. Even if you wouldn’t do anything for the rest of your life – you are still valuable and worthy. Can you believe that?