Hi Tee,

He came over in the morning and started talking, like I haven’t seen you in a long time how have you been? Then he sat by the count er next to me had drinks talked with my manager, and then two of his friends joined. The were just sitting talking and drinking, and right before i left the started playing pool.

It was very laid back and he is quite the party person so people didn’t expect him to stay at work drinking. He has talked about his drinking and how much he used to party (all day but with two hours sleep and then party again) then he regrets it and knows it is bad for him, and he is trying to cut down on it. I know he has a dopamine seeking brain but this sounds more like escaping trauma or something. When he is with my two girlfriends they get absolutly wasted and a bit friendly with each other. At least he didn’t do that with me so I’m not an enebler.

Yes, I will focus on this as a learning opportunity. I have noticed that i have started self sabotaging again, i get more defensive and push people away but that’s understandable with everything that has happened. The guy situation is also harder and gonna take longer because it made me feel betrayed and excluded by friends.