Dear Kaya:

“I had a group session and learned NPARR practice.  Notice, pause, Address, Respond and Redirect.  This isn’t easy to apply but I’m practicing NPARR with my family“- that’s wonderful… The NPARR practice is something I came up with, you must have read posts I submitted to other members in regard to this.

You shared that at elementary school, a few girls were mean to you in class, you fought back, the teacher was on your side, but as a result of you fighting back and/ or as a result of the teacher being on your side (which one is it?), your classmates ignored you for years. In middle school, your schoolmates requested that you get them VIP tickets for an event, you refused, and they ignored you.

“I do not have any communication problems at work…  I could control myself at work but not in my private time, I  become short tempered, etc.,  but not at the work.  If I do, I would not keep this job“- you should extend your practice of self-control to the context of your private friendships and relationships because if you don’t … you would not keep a friend or boyfriend .

“Thank you again..  I will need a few days to process and understand the meaning of your words“-You are very welcome and I am glad that you are taking your times to process my input. I am looking forward to reading from you again.

anita