Dear Melissa –

Your situation is difficult and one many teens, parents, and siblings go through. I say this only to remind you that none of you are alone.

I agree with what Anita and Melissa wrote. The one thing I would add is to celebrate (with your daughter and family) your daughter’s ability to admit she needs help! This is huge when facing such darkness/lethargy. Many people resort to binging on food, booze, drugs, exercise, not talking, etc.

As someone diagnosed with severe depression, being HSP, and who has had PTSD, I share the following… There’s no one-size-fits-all remedy. We must remember this when helping others.

–Do things together (even if just for an hour a few times a week) that do not cause stress or focus on her depression… Focus on what she would like to do (sometimes we need nudging when depressed) and then, focus on what each family member likes to do. For example, go take photos with your cellphones, have game nights, look on Groupon for local events like painting together (bring son & husband along too), and take the focus off the depression and worries for the time you all are together. “No cellphones or depression talk” during this time.

–Maybe go volunteer as a family… Often, helping others helps us. The more we do it–the clearer our perspective becomes.

–Sometimes, boredom is part of the problem too… Not doing anything for too long most often increases the feelings your daughter is experiencing. Our brains do not like to stay static. Just reading, meditating, doing Yoga, going for a walk, doing puzzles, etc., helps.

–Consider having her evaluated for HSP (Highly Sensitive Person)

–Consider having hormone tests done

–Does she have good friends nearby?

Lastly, I learned this quote many years ago and it hit home for me. Maybe it will for your daughter, you, your husband, and your son too. Knowing what Viktor E. Frankl experienced helps us get what he meant…

“Everything can be taken from a (hu)man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.” “When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.”

I hope this helps in some way.

Thinking of you all and sending loads of positive vibes your way.

D