Dear Lost1Flow,

I’d like to address something you’ve said about your family:

I had a chance at having my own life, with a man I really loved years ago, but my family kept me away from him. Now he’s married. How do I move past the resentment that they kept me (and continue keeping me) from a happy, normal life of my own?

Your family prevented you from building a life with the man you really loved. Since you feel resentment towards them, it tells me they have wronged you. Because he wasn’t a bad person, was he? You could have been happy with him, or at least you could have tried. But your family somehow convinced you to forego that marriage and stay with them, perhaps so you can take care of them?

Your mother says she wants the best for you:

She says she wants me to live my life, but at the same time she’s so dependent on me.

But let me ask you something: when you wanted to marry the man you loved, how supportive was she of that?