At 40 years old, I find myself facing a predicament. To provide some context, my early years were quite ordinary until I reached the age of 10. It was around this time that I came to the realization that my parents never celebrated my birthday, which was in stark contrast to the experiences of other children my age. This revelation had a profound impact on me, and by the age of 9 or 10, I began resorting to theft within my own home and fabricating elaborate stories about myself. Unfortunately, my actions eventually caught up with me, and I was caught in the act. In response, my father resorted to physical punishment and severed all ties with me for the rest of his life. Instead of seeking resolution, he distanced himself from me and adopted a controlling demeanor.

As I grew older and started working, my father assumed control over my finances. He not only prevented me from developing my own personality but also eroded my self-confidence through constant insults and humiliation. When I began earning, he continued to manage my money, providing me with only what I needed for basic expenses while making investment decisions on my behalf.

He also arranged my marriage to a person of his choosing, a union hastily confirmed after just one meeting. Unfortunately, this marriage eventually ended due to dowry demands. After the divorce, he left me feeling worthless, insisting that my life was over. He continued to present me with subpar marriage proposals, expecting me to compromise, all while maintaining a demeaning tone he had used since I was ten years old.

Frustrated with this situation, I became involved with a co-worker, which initially started as a casual relationship but later blossomed into a marriage. However, I faced challenges with conceiving after the wedding. My father, in a rare gesture, offered to pay for in vitro fertilization (IVF), which, despite two attempts, has not been successful.

The controlling behavior and constant belittlement from my father have greatly impacted my self-esteem throughout my life. I am now in need of a fresh perspective and guidance on how to navigate these challenges.