Dear Anita,

” When you find yourself worried and ruminating about a situation, or a person, ask yourself if you can change the situation or the person in any way that’s objectively significant. If you can’t, ask yourself what’s the purpose of your ruminating.”

A current example I am actually ruminating is on one of my friends. I am not sure if it is the particular phase she is in, or if me entering this spiritual awakening journey has opened my eyes to a more permanent issue. My birthday is at the end of this month (Seaturtle turns 25! woo hoo 🙂 )  and my dads generous gift to me is a weekend at his palm springs home, where I can invite some girls, I have two friends I have been in contact with recently my roommate, and P, who I used to be closer with and her living in AZ is part of the reason I moved here! But ever since this guy she has been with, she is so negative, and she talks just so much, doesn’t allow a moment of silence. She cuts me off, I can hardly get a story out, I know way more about her life and minor inconveniences than she does about my personal life. She doesn’t listen when I talk she just waits to talk, and my patiences is falling away. In trying to be a good friend I have spent time with her and just allowed her to vent. But my birthday weekend in palm springs… is something I am finding myself wanting to control the energy of. My roommate is a good listener and in a much clearer headspace, fairly honest with herself and third eye definitely is fluttering open, my other friend, hers is closed, she lies to herself and excuses toxic behavior with her current partner. Out of habit I invited them both to palm springs, if I didn’t invite her it would have really hurt her feelings, but now I am finding myself want to have a talk with her about the things she says and how much she talks… my roommate has also pointed both of those things out but she has lots of patience, like me. Is this something that falls under my control? If so, do you have any advice on how to speak with her in a productive way/ an “objectively significant way? I know she has more potential, I have seen her third eye more open (I think, but this was before I started this deeper spiritual journey), it is certainly closed right now.

-In general, a good question, as I awaken my third eye and start to see people close to me in a more raw light, how do I manage it in a non-condescending way without allowing them to bring me down? Have you (anyone reading) experienced this?

Seaturtle