Helcat,

I forgot to respond to your question “I don’t know if you felt like you were thinking about the relationship when you didn’t want to?”

The answer is yes. I have also felt myself talking about it here and with others when I haven’t truly wanted to. But I recently heard something from a book that stuck with me, the author said he asks himself ‘would you rather know what your mind has to say or have the opportunity to experience an absence of the personal mind.’ From it I created a sort of mantra I have been repeating to myself when thoughts of the relationships come or an urge to speak it comes, I say in my mind ‘I would rather experience a quiet mind than go down all these mind trails and visions of “what if this, what if that.” ‘ In the book the author pointed out that what our personal mind is yapping about is statistically insignificant because it is based on so many “what ifs.”

Seaturtle