Dear Anita

I see my issue, from this incidence, is that I tend to overreact and often the overreacting is the second arrow of suffering in Buddhist’s saying. If I could clarify this earlier, or ideally on spot, then i wouldn’t have endured this week’s suffering as much as I had.

Catching the monkey mind requires a very good reflection of what I am feeling, and skills to catch it. it’s not easy but I guess I can try to detach myself instead of immersing myself in those emotions, which I was for the past week. Although I do empathize myself since this is still very upsetting to hear your partner grow apart , but afterall, not everyone is a buddha or saint so I guess my reaction is pretty normal.

Throughout the years I have learned not to expect your family to be the family that you wish for. We are blood related but that does not mean they are the ones who can understand you or give you comfort that you look for. I also learned that I am the  only person who has the gift and opportunities to cultivate my knowledge and wisdom, so I kind of asked myself to take a more heavy responsibilities in terms of  the relationship with my family.

don’t hide your legitimate needs out of fear- this is so true, for now I am a bit scared of what will happen, but if I want to pursue love, this fear needs to be addressed and contained or even elimiated

Thanks Anita and all

Clara