Hi Clara

I hope that you have a safe trip!

I do actually have a book recommendation, since you asked. This was recommended to me by my old psychologist. Fantastic woman. The book is called Reinventing Your Life by Jeffrey Young. It is not expensive online. I think that free copies might even be found if you look hard enough.

You are a caring person and try your best. I know that you would not want to hurt anyone. It is a painful realisation that there are still things to work on. You can only manage what you are aware of. Now you are aware. You weren’t before.

I don’t know if this will be helpful to you, everyone is different. Anger is often the result of unmet needs. I started a journal of all of the times I felt angry. Wrote down the situation,  immediate thoughts, and any circumstances like hunger, pain, lack of sleep, stress etc. I found often I was angry when I was tired and hungry. All of the factors I mentioned adversely affect emotional regulation which can make a person more reactive and irritable.

Love and best wishes! ❤️🙏