Hi Anita

Thank you for your kind words! I’m am perfectly fine talking about these things. Thank you for asking. I really do appreciate your help.

Yes, I agree that reducing stress is a priority.

Yes, that is the jist of things for the recent dynamic. In the past things have been different. I tended to be the one to initiate talking about problems. Then when it would get too stressful I would shut down and the pattern would be similar from that point.

Things have been too stressful for me to want to talk about things recently. I also don’t like for conversations to get stressful around the baby. So that plays a part in why I withdraw more frequently now too.

In the past, I would say that my husband had been less bothered by things than me. But I think that things have been difficult for a while being pregnant and having a baby. So he is just as fed up as me at this point.

I think it varies. Sometimes I do trust him. Sometimes I don’t trust him. Sometimes I wouldn’t trust anyone. Sometimes I would trust other people. It is also about emotional regulation. The arguments have been a lot recently, so I would definitely say that lack of trust with how he responds to things has been a factor.

Blaming each other is a common pattern for us. We also have difficulty listening to each other during arguments. It is like having two entirely separate conversations at the same time.

For me, I would say that if my husband raised his voice. I would start to shut down emotionally and get defensive. In that state, I have difficulties with expressing positive regard.

Love and best wishes! ❤️🙏