Hello Dave,

Long distance relationship tend to be an odd ball. From personal experience of 3 years with a guy In LD relationship. I can say one thing- that you definitely have to put effort from both sides. If one person is falling short/ making excuses for not having time, eventually you will start questioning the nature of your relationship. She emphasizes on being ” right there ” because as humans we have a proclivity to hold on to something that is close, tangible and in our reach. Not to say this is an excuse for her to not take time out for you. If you are anywhere on her priority list, it will come naturally and be effortless. Personally my relationship couldn’t survive because the guy had very similar tendencies that you mentioned. I did try to make him understand and work at things. But the distance really does become chaotic if you don’t direct it in the right direction .
It’s better to put your concerns out there in all honesty and if the person is still not responding to your needs and wants in a relationship then you have your answer. Hopefully things will work out for you, just be authentic to yourself and her and have clear expectations and boundaries. It’s better to do this sooner than later. Good Luck !

– Zita