Hiya,

well, first of all, you sound like were head of heels for this girl. There is no girl in this entire world which wouldn’t want to be described like the girl you have.

The one thing that resonates through your post is that for things to grow you have to give them space… like a plant. Things can’t grown if they’re being squeezed, pressured and cornered. Thus, I would say to maybe let her be more free, both of you need to be more independent. This is no bad reflection you. It is a great thing that you know who you are what your traits are. She has been around all this time, why not talk to her about your feelings and try to find yourself and grow together as a couple? She may well support you as you try to deal with your anxiety, after all she must feel strongly about you to still be there.

I’m really sorry if I sound harsh. A few years ago I dated a guy with OCD. I didn’t know he had it, but after a few months he become fixated on me. We got along really well, but I felt trapped. Sadly, because he got too fixated, we broke up. But, after a year or so of counselling and mediation we become friends again. He’s a really great guy and we talk a lot still although we’re not together. I would never hold the way he acted towards me against him. He was in a different place back then and he had a journey to go on. We all need to do some self development at some point… maybe it is time that you let go so you can deal with yourself. If she is strong enough and cares enough, she will still be there… and if she’s not, you will then have yourself back. The true happy you. After all… sometimes good things fall apart, so better things can fall together.

Take care and look after yourself.