Lindsey,

That is very normal, and its good that you have some quiet activities you enjoy. Consider that “slipping” is OK, it happens. Try not to, of course, but when you do, just do. Meaning, when you’re acting dysfunctional, don’t let it be “this is just what Lindsey does”, but rather “OK, what’s really here?” What does your body feel? What does it see? What does it hear? Just look, feel, smell, sense. Let it be information, a curious puzzle. Such as “OK, today I am doing this to myself. What is actually happening? What am I feeling?” This will help break the ruts, because when we pay attention to our actions and how the body actually feels when we act that way, the urge to do it again decreases.

Good luck on your recovery, and I hope you find the tender space of compassion for yourself. You deserve it!

With warmth,
Matt