Dear Hayley,
I can’t say I know what it’s like being in your shoes, because I do not know. I’ve been through thick and thin, I’ve suffered a lot but that will not help anyone but me. “If you are going through hell, keep going.” I recently broke my leg and have not been able to walk for months. I am, like you said, always trying to keep a positive attitude towards life. I was in a lot of pain but the pain was not physical, it was mental. I don’t often let pain play with my emotions. This time I did and pain opened a door I never knew existed. I walked through that door and understood what I had done. I had opened myself to not just my emotions but to life as well. Because life is not all flowers and rainbows and by choosing not to see the difficult times I had become biast. I had tried to ignore the pain and every negative thing I’ve seen or been through. Now I am settled, I am in peace with myself. Life is not easy and it shouldn’t be. Peaceful times have not made a dexterous warrior and steady sees have not made a skillful sailor. I recommend the movie “peaceful warrior”, because you are a warrior. if you ever need anyone to talk to feel free to reply and ask for a contact.
Best wishes :]