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If words are important to you, as they’ve always been to me, then it’s even more effective to take away those words for a while. Refusing to participate in a conversation and constantly interrupting it. When words start to appear, instead of grabbing onto them, actively let go. Refuse to hold them in your mind. It is kind of like a passive resistance.
It is possible to exist without having a constant narrative about what is happening, what has happened and what will happen. It is possible to just be. Even for a short while, and when you get the hang of it, it will be your refuge when things start to get too much for you to handle. Painful situations rarely last long. It is the mind that holds onto them and replays them over and over and over again, prolonging the pain or making it worse. Sure, your mind can also visualize things, and people do have flashbacks. But in order to analyze what you see and hear, you’ll need words and it’s the analysis part where things can start to go wrong and become twisted.
So how to stop the questions from appearing? You can’t prevent them from appearing, but you can refuse to continue the discussion or the thought process. If you’ve ever been interrupted a lot of times in a row, you’ll know that even forming a sentence will become really difficult. Same thing in this case. When you refuse to participate in the chatter, it will eventually die down and becomes more sporadic.
Take time to pay more attention to the sensations in your body. What you hear, see, feel, taste…without the narrative. Essentially, mindfulness meditation. You’ll notice how the constant narrative is not needed and that there is this other part of you as well: your body. The ego would like to think that it’s everything that you are and if it’s threatened, it’s like you’d die. But you’re not going to die, even if the ego would die, or shatter, or get bruised. The ego is there for a reason, but it needs to be in balance with everything else and it can’t be activated all the time, as if you were constantly under threat. You’re not, and being mindful about your surroundings helps to calm down and realize this.
I can’t really explain it much better, not least because English isn’t my first language 🙂 It’s also such an abstract subject. This is just how I got help for myself: by taking control over the words, I got control over my mind and subsequently my life.