Thank you Emmanuelle. You seem to know exactly how it feels.

My partner knows how I feel about him talking to her and but he doesn’t see the problem and he wont stop just because I ask. He says he can talk to whoever he wants whether it be her or other female friends. On one hand, I don’t want to be the controlling girlfriend who dictates his life and yes, I believe he should be able to speak to whomever he wants. And on the other hand, I want him to realise the impact the situation has on our relationship.

When I said to him that I don’t trust their friendship, he too was offended. He couldn’t believe that I doubt his love for me. I think as I have cheated in the past, I know what all the right things to say and do (I am not proud of it) and it makes me wonder whether he is feeding me lines as I have done the same previously.

I want to have a constructive conversation with him but he just closes up and says I need to sort out my feelings as he is doing nothing wrong. I sometimes feel as though I have too many feelings for him to deal with.

Like you, I am trying to work on myself. Perhaps it is not the situation, it’s just how I am reacting to it but I don’t know how to change or whether I should have to change. “to trust someone I want to spend the rest of my life with, and to not let the past take over my emotions”… you’ve summed up exactly how I feel.