For both of you to come out of your suffering about the past I would recommend following the path to loving yourself. Even if you pushed the other away. it will be challenging at first because you have to undo all the effects of negative thinking but you are worth so much more than what that person was not willing to give you. Our relationships are our mirror to ourselves and what you feel is missing now is something that you are not giving yourself. You both deserve so much better and deserve to smile and be happy. Ending your life will not solve the issue at hand. And those that do love you will miss you. I recommend the work of Esther and Jerry Hicks (Abraham) and Louise Hay as a starting place. I’ve been there. Please take care.
Though I run this site, it is not mine. It's ours. It's not about me. It's about us. Your stories and your wisdom are just as meaningful as mine. 