Jason,

I think you just have trouble with quieting your mind (like most of us). You said in your initial post ‘Can’t seem to shut off my mind, my ego that wants to go,go,go’

This is what we are encouraging you to do, in the best way we can explain it. I think Ruminant does a fantastic job breaking it down to provide one view of what affects what, and the first paragraph of his first post is what I want to echo. To add to that, I want to make this simple, because simple is what I feel you are looking for at the moment. Later on, you can fill in the gaps with the how and why it ties together. But right now I’m pretty confident that you just want the simple go to answer. And it is simple, there is no deep thinking or searching for meaning involved.

Don’t think. Feel.

Start now if you want, for a minute. Just feel your senses. Listen to your senses, the information being taken in.

If you start to have thoughts float by, like ‘should this mean something?’ or ‘what is supposed to happen?’, let them float right on by. Those are nonsense thoughts for the moment.

Close your eyes. We are very stimulated by sights, and can easily be distracted by them, bringing up more useless (for the moment) thoughts. Let your focus check in on your other senses, one at a time. Sense different parts of the body. Allow yourself to just feel. No judging or figuring out or planning or organizing or questioning or remembering.

Just feel.

You’re spending a lot of time looking for answers, which can lead to spending a lot of mental energy, putting the brain through a lot of work. The brain needs to rest, even outside of your nightly sleep. I suspect that is what you can use at the moment. That’s because I keep thinking of your comment of ‘can’t seem to shut off my mind’.

Put aside the quest for meaning. Quiet the mind. Just feel, and without expectation of finding anything.

After you’ve practiced that for a bit (up to you for how long), notice if you feel any different.

Hope this helps