Matt, good advice. I agree that the key is my intentions. Letting go, accepting that this isn’t for me, etc would certainly end the problem effectively. I have been oscillating between a state where that acceptance prevails and a state where the desire has had the upper hand. At times where I was nearly letting go, Liz could sense it and relaxed. At times when the butterflies were out in force, she became apprehensive. It’s amazing how just a little gesture, an emoticon or a few words on Skype or email can communicate what’s happening with one of us, and how that loops back to the other. Although we now can only see each other once per week when she comes visit us for a weekend afternoon and dinner (she has already found a new job) we are still in touch daily by email, Skype, phone. I wonder if completely breaking off all contact for a while would help me settle my intention firmly and release the butterflies.