hi Sat Nam…:)
i dont know why but i feel comfortable to open up to you than with anybody in my life right now…and i hope u wont get irritated with me who keeps on cropping up in your blog.. a friend of mine keeps budgering me on the latest in my life, but i dont feel like telling her yet.. im wondering why..so here goes… on my other blog, i think it was Anonymous who told me to figure out to do what i want and learn how to ask for it..well , i did exactly that with my family.. well just a little bit of what i want.. you see i want to work again, by doing that i have to leave my son for a while on their care.. i trust them completely.. my son is treated as a prince here actually.. tsktsk..grandparents really spoil kids..:).. since i have to start from scratch with my new job..(hopefully)..my board and lodging and all that.. and since i still couldn’t afford a babysitter on my own for now.. my parents especially my mom just wanted me to promise that i wont go back to my husband immediately once i start working there, coz my workplace will be near him but far from family…she said she’ll let me borrow money so i could start with my new job..but i have to promise her that i wont get back with my husband.. i felt a bit guilty.. so i stated half truths.. well actually it’s really true that i have my misgivings right now.. coz my husband could only afford a house near his family right now.. but he promised its just a temporary arrangement.. he asked me to stay there with him for just a year.. then by that time he can already afford to get a place for our own.. that time it will already be away from everybody else.. here in our place, its so hard to have a home. especially in the city, so you really have to save first and rent for a while.. that place near them we wont be renting coz its his father’s apartment.. we just have to take care of the bills… so you see, its really a practical choice..although dont know how ill face my inlaws again…
im just bothered with what my own family would react if the time will come that i have to tell them the truth.. that i still want my husband…im scared of hurtng them further, after everything that they have done for me..