I second Mike’s recommendation.

This may or may not be helpful:

You may hate me for saying this but I think it’s best to focus on your anxiety and self-esteem first since it is impacting your relationships and work life instead of the other way around.

Another thing that may be relevant is the afterglow of being in a rush all your life. We feel rushed to finish highschool, we feel rushed to finish our degrees and we also feel rushed to get a job ASAP. Breaking out of this cycle is hard but can be useful.

Have you noticed kids can play day and night or paint silly pictures and be happy in the moment? Well, we aren’t kids, but it’s always helpful to have some time to do anything without a real goal like reading a book or watching youtube videos that are funny. It’s relaxation time. It’s not a waste of time, it’s relaxation time and considered to be necessary for coping with stress.

Are you the type of person who works real hard, but doesn’t really sit down to watch a movie?

Sleep and eat on time, but try making time in your day to watch an episode of something you like.

Try looking online for common negative patterns of thinking by searching “thought loops/traps -cognitive behavioural therapy” online. There is an interesting list of common patterns.