Jeroen,

I’d say that I’m sorry about your situation but I’m really not, for this is an opportunity for you to work on yourself and be better than ever. You said that she made you feel confident. Well, here is one thing that perhaps you can work on now. Here’s the secret, people can sniff out confidence like its some kind of sixth sense.

Believe in yourself, and have full confidence in yourself, (try some affirmations, they are powerful tools). When you achieve this, you’ll find that the quality of people that enter your life will be much higher than your ex-girlfriend. In fact, if this never happened, you probably wouldn’t ever need to work on believing yourself and becoming stronger within so this is truly an opportunity for you.

If you don’t take it, then you’re in trouble. But I know that you won’t do that, because while you work on yourself and loving yourself, you’ll have the double benefit of not only being on another level, but also never looking back at that old relationship you had.

Your situation calls for overwhelming force, that is, use all the tools in your arsenal (don’t have many? get more, like affirmations) to better yourself and avoid thinking about her. Try to even make a list of what you don’t like about her, this may help, it helped me see that I have so much more to offer and that I was being held back this whole time.

Stick to no-contact (that is, you never initiate contact). keep it short and civil if you have to interact with her. You have a ton of time now that you’re free (yea i said it, you’re free, oh no!!), so take up a new hobby, go to the gym and get shredded (a personal favorite), spend more time with friends and family. Nurture yourself, this is the time to act and improve, do so before time passes and you get comfortable again with where you are, fight the urge to not do anything with yourself. You’ll be glad you work hard in the end

You got this, the biggest challenges are made out for the strongest people. This is a big challenge…. so , I think you get the message.

Cheers,

Singh