Hi Yohannes, I just want to say that I used to be in your position, where I thought that I was useless and should have given up. However, everytime I am thinking about suicide or other harmful actions, I can’t stop but to think about what will happen next if I ever do it. I don’t want to leave my lovely family because they have been so kind to me and I want to repay them, and I don’t want to give up now because I have been fighting and searching for a reason to live in this world. If I give up now then all of my sacrifices were in vain so I decide that I am going to fight more because I was able to do that in the past so there is no reason I can’t now. You should focus more on the positive side of your life. As an example, you have a caring girlfriend right? Do you really want to make her disappointed? Don’t you want to make her happy? Remember, life is full of surprise, you will never know what will happen in the next day. Maybe life has prepared something wonderful for you, all you need to do is just to keep fighting and wait for it. Even though I have a lot of negative thoughts in my mind and my life is not as bright as others, I have a belief that, in the end, everything is gonna be fine. That belief is the one that keeps me going, so please don’t give up… Everyone is also fighting just like you, you are not alone 🙂